Thursday 17 April 2014

Sheep




Once upon a time Scaur FC, an amateur football team in Nithsdale, penetrated through to the qualifying stages of the Scottish Cup and were drawn against a team from Motherwell who arrived in the wee village with a bus load of supporters who were soon running backwards and forwards to the little field behind the pub photographing sheep and sending them back to their relatives on their phones. "I've never seen one so close. They're quite friendly looking, eh?" In the pub some of the visitors had cornered a local woman and were asking "aye but what de ye dae?. I mean fir fun? or fir a hairdo?". It was very much a clash of cultures, though everyone got on famously. After they'd left, a stalwart of the club Geordie Logan described how another time they'd  been visited by folk from the city and someone had remarked about one of the sheep which had been dipped bright orange. "Aye", Geordie had said, "that's the type they get the goalies' jerseys from."


Sunday 6 April 2014

No Deid Yet





Traditional response of the auld heid to the salutary greeting “How are ye?”- “No deid yet.” This response sums up in just three words the indominatibility of the human spirit while simultaneously giving a glimpse of the depths of terrible suffering experienced by the auld heid in the normal everyday course of his long existence. An alternative to no deid yet, if the auld heid is being playfully loquacious would be “Hingin on”, or “Just hingin on an nae mair”.